I believe in sincerity. I believe in justice. I believe in compassion and kindness, and loyalty. I believe in respect for all people if they are truly good people, if they are deserving of respect. No one who is cruel and seeks to hurt others is deserving of respect because I do not believe that respect is a right. It’s not. It is a privilege, something that one should earn, not something that everyone should give freely just for the simple fact that we are all human beings and thereby entitled to respect. That is bullshit, and I will tell you why : because there are 7 billion ( or more, could be more but I say 7 billion because that’s what I’ve heard anyway ) human beings in this world and plenty of them are bullies. Predators. The kind of people who will victimize anyone they perceive as weak or vulnerable, the kind of people who see the personal suffering of another person and for no reason that I can understand, they will try everything in their power to make it worse. They will just…spread the most disgusting lies about another person, they will turn others against them, ugh…and it makes me so freaking angry because how does it make sense, to claim people like that deserve respect only because they are human. To me, that is like going up to someone and saying “Hey, I respect you, man, not because you’re a decent person -which you’re not but that’s alright. I just respect the way that you are bullying that kid over there, the fact that you’re adding to all the hurt that he or she is already going through. Good on you!” To make a statement such as “everyone deserves respect” is an insult to all the people in this world who are caring and good and thoughtful in their actions and behavior toward others.
I believe in equality for all people. I believe that, cliche or “corny” as it may sound, love is a force or an emotion or whatever it is, more powerful than anything on this Earth. Hate – hate in its purest, in it strongest and ugliest form is the only force that has the power to destroy everything good in this world. Hate is blind, hate is a force that has the power to turn human beings in to…well, monsters, pretty much. There is more and more proof of that every day. There is this notion that “love is blind”, and maybe that is true but hate is just as blind, and personally I would rather be blinded by love than hate. But I still believe that love is more enduring. I have to believe that.
I believe in myself, although I am not afraid to admit that I doubt myself every day. I believe that there is more sense and more for me to gain in pursuing a career as a writer rather than a career in the areas that I am studying at uni, those being criminology and psychology. The reason for this is simple. I love writing more than criminology and psychology. I suppose one could ask “Well than why aren’t you studying English…or creative writing? ” Again, I have an answer for this valid question. Anyone can write, it is not difficult at all. But not all persons who make an attempt to write fiction or articles about life events or whatever else, not all of them will have the ability to make a connection with their readers. Not every writer will have the ability to make their readers feel anything at all. Writing is an art one can teach, but with every writer there is one absolute : they either have the ability to make an emotional connection with readers, or they don’t. They can either inspire a person who reads their work, they can make a reader cry or laugh or generate strong emotions ranging from anger to joy to happiness to everything else that one can feel when they read what another human being has written. That is a f–king talented writer; a born writer. And than you have the other type of writers – the ones who write but…well. It may be articulate and grammatically correct and incredibly esoteric, but the reader feels nothing at all. It just…it makes you feel empty. Or one reads this writer’s work and it does not resonate with them at all. I’m sorry but it is true. You get the writers who blow your freaking mind and make you feel everything, and the writers who don’t stimulate you in any way. So, I would rather not study writing because I am scared. I am scared that, in the process of working towards a writing degree, I may find out what kind of writer I am, and it may turn out that I am the kind of writer who leaves a person feeling absolutely nothing after they read something that I have created. I put my heart and soul in to a piece of writing, I hand it in to someone to read then they come back to me and say “Write this again. Because it was not good enough. I felt absolutely nothing when I read it”. I don’t know about other writers, but that would f–king crush me.
My family tell me that I am a talented writer, my mother in particular. She often tells me that I am meant to write, and to share everything that I write with the world. And don’t get me wrong, I love my family. I believe them and I believe in them. I trust them. I would never imply that any of them are liars in their support of my writing. But everyone has their own fears and insecurities; and mine are directly related to everything that is important to me, everyone and everything that I love, one example being writing.
Aspergian*101 